One Past Life Memory – Many Meanings


Tabea is a woman in her mid-fourties. She has been exploring past lifes for many years. When she set out toget to know her soul-biografie one pressing issue was her fear to take leadership.

Life kept putting her in situations in which she was looked at as a leader and asked for leadership. But she dreaded being followed. She was confused by both. The fact that she was beeing followed without asking for it as well as her dislike for it. 

At the beginning she thought it was just that she preferd people to be independent and less attached, that she enjoyed freedom and being considered a leader was reducing that.

She also considered that it might be connected to not liking responsibility for others but she felt there was more to it than the obvious, since the discomfort seemed to be stemming form her very core.

When exploring a past lifes as an option she found an answer. Indeed she had been a leader in many lifetimes, a good one. Her people trusted her, loved her, followed her because of her integrity and advanced skills. This did not change after the whole group got whiped out because they followed her, she however was devastated.

What had happend was, that she felt guilty for the fact that most of her followers died because of following her. None of them put the blame on her, none. She spoke to them across the dimensions. But she was heartbroken and down ridden by guilt and shame. It was her personal horror, that she was the reason they had died. 

Realizing this and the fact that herfollowers still loved and respected her the same and did not consider her responsible for their death, was comforting for her and released a lot of her tension when it came to being considered an authority to be followed.

The years went by and she did not think of this past life. Until she was stuck in a situation which she could not change and influence in everybodies best interest, no matter how much she tried. It was then that another layer of meaning of that life exposed itself to her.

She was connecting to the multidimensionality contemplating the situation to get a better understanding, when she connected to her old group of followers. One of them spoke to her gently and lovingly. He said to her: „You can not always control the outcome“ 

While saying that a whole set of realization connected to that past life was rushing through her system. She saw, felt und unterstood, that at that time she had done all the right things and nothing could have prevented the outcome her group was facing. She understood and integrated more deeply, that it really had not been her fault and more so that we cannot control the outcome, we can only respond to what life is presenting us with.

It was a strong lesson, an intense lesson and it had been waiting for her to be ready to understand it. Years ago she just had to understand that no one blamed her, to move on and grow. 

Now it was time for her to understand that some things were completely beyond her control and to be at peace with it.

It changed her from the inside out. Her anxiety to do things „right“to be prepared for any situation to be flawless and do her very best changed into a state of selfcompassion and then for the first time in her life she reached a new level of inner peace and freedom. She was responsible for how she responded to situations in her life but she could not control the outcome. What a blissful truth to embrace. Responding to life? That she could do one moment at a time!

This meaning had always been part of that experience but it was not until that moment she could understand and integrate it. 

So yes, just like the meaning we give present life experience can change or diversify that is also the case for past life experiences, some of them bear gifts for us to discover in years and even lifetimes to come.

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